Jimbo's Jots

We continue our review and reflection of The Blessing by John Trent and Gary Smalley. After the first chapter, the book is divided into four sections:

1. Why is the Blessing So Important?
2. Understanding the Blessing
3. When the Blessing Doesn’t Happen
4. Living the Blessing Challenge

Chapter 2 starts off the discussion of “Why is the Blessing So Important?”. The authors have us go in our minds and partner with two people, Brian and Nancy. In each story, there is a “search for the blessing” that is never given from a parent. The results of still searching lead to continued brokenness for each.

What we learn through these stories is that everyone longs for acceptance. Think about the tragedy’s of last week. The cries from our nation are #BlackLivesMatter, #BlueLivesMatter and #AllLivesMatter. People all around our nation are looking for acceptance from others . . . and some of them are searching because maybe they never found acceptance at home.

They, and maybe we, struggle with relationships with others keeping them just close enough because it’s safe and we feel that is one thing that we can control. We look for someone in a partner that will meet our need for acceptance while conflicted with how close we really want them to be. We create the need for acceptance with our children through “provision” and “accomplishments” so we can feel accepted and at the same time base their feelings of approval and acceptance on measurable success like academics, music and athletics.

Another layer of our conflict is the “over your shoulder” concept. Even as adults, we are still looking for “the blessing” from our parents. So, while we have moved away from the home physically, we are still bound to the past emotionally. (Trent and Smalley, p. 23) This can lead a person having a hard time feeling accepted by others genuinely. They begin to question those feelings as being real and sincere.

Sometimes, it leads to our thoughts of God too. We have a hard time accepting a genuine, sincere approval from God with our conditions. We feel that in order to get God’s approval we have to do more. How many people have we heard say on their deathbeds, “If only I had . . . ” How many of us have said, “If I could . . ., then God will bless me.” And God says, “‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore [we] will boast all the more gladly about [our] weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on [us].” (Words of Paul, edited, 2 Corinthians 12:9)

With God, there is no looking over our shoulder for acceptance. His promises and blessing are sure!!