Jimbo's Jots

Last week, we talked about the closeness scale using the Prepare-Enrich Assessment. Another component of this particular scale is flexibility. In any lasting relationship, one truth is undeniable: change is constant. Jobs change. Families grow. Circumstances shift. But how well a couple adjusts—together—can mean the difference between merely surviving and genuinely thriving. That’s where the Flexibility Scale from Prepare-Enrich offers both insight and challenge.

Flexibility isn’t about being passive or giving in. It’s about adapting in ways that are healthy, mutual, and sustainable. Scripture echoes this need for adaptability, not just in crisis, but in everyday connection. Here are the key principles when talking about flexibility:

• Role changes (Who does what and when)
• Routine changes (Schedules, traditions, expectations)
• Communication during change
• Emotional adjustment (How you both feel and react)
• Shared decision-making

The goal, then, is not perfection—but resilience. Couples with high flexibility can navigate life’s ups and downs as a team, adjusting to new realities while maintaining a strong connection. They are able to stretch without breaking.

Here are three nuggets to remember as well:

1. God Models Flexibility in Relationship

   “The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us.” — John 1:14 God didn’t demand that we reach up to Him. He came down to us. The incarnation is the ultimate act of divine flexibility—God adapting to our world to show love and save us. If God moves toward us in love, we can move toward each other in humility and grace.

2. Wise Couples Adapt Together

   “Two are better than one… If either of them falls, one can help the other up.” — Ecclesiastes 4:9-10. Wise couples recognize that success isn’t about one person being right—it’s about both working together to respond wisely to life’s changes. Flexibility means bending for each other, not breaking apart under pressure.

3. Flexibility Requires Humility

   “Do nothing out of selfish ambition… Rather, in humility, value others above yourselves.” — Philippians 2:3. Rigid relationships often stem from pride. But flexibility grows from humility. When each partner is willing to listen, to yield, and to try something new, love deepens. Scripture teaches that love “does not insist on its own way” (1 Corinthians 13:5). That’s the heart of flexibility.

Practically, this is what flexibility looks like:

1. Pray for a Soft Heart – Ask God to help you hold expectations lightly and each other closely.
2. Practice Saying “Yes” – Try saying yes to your partner’s preferences—even small ones—to stretch your comfort zone.
3. Schedule “Check-In” Conversations – Use the “Three T’s”: Talk about Transitions, Tasks, and Togetherness. Ask: “What’s changing right now?” “How can I help?”
4. Return to Scripture Together – Let the Word anchor you in God’s unchanging love—even when everything else feels unstable.

When couples grow in flexibility, they’re not just becoming better partners—they’re becoming more like Christ. He bent low to lift us up. He yielded His rights for our good. He models a kind of love that adapts without losing its core.

So, let’s stretch. Not to the breaking point—but to the beautiful place where grace lives, love grows, and God gets the glory.

Be blessed in your stretching!! Be a blessing to others as well!!